As a parent or carer, you may worry about whether your child is safe online. It can help to understand what the risks are, and how to talk to your child about them.
Online spaces can be a positive thing. But they can also come with risks. Understanding where the dangers might be can help you educate your child.
The internet is always changing, so it’s good to keep up with the latest technologies and the possible risks. Recent research from Virgin Media O2 and Internet Matters found parents and carers worried about their children:
Before you speak to your child, think about your attitude to them spending time online. Do you complain about them spending time online, or dismiss social media? If your child thinks you have a negative attitude, conversations may feel more confrontational.
Take some time to think about how you spend time online and why being online could be important to your child too. Consider both the positives and negatives.
Try starting an honest conversation with them. It might not feel like an easy topic. Your child may be secretive or defensive when you approach the subject. Talk about the things you both enjoy and share your favourite sites with each other. Let them know that they can come to you with any worries, and you will help them work out what to do.
Virgin Media O2 and Internet Matters’ Find the Right Words campaign has advice for having more confident conversations about online safety. You can download their guide with helpful tips to start the conversation.
Support your child to learn how they can look after themself. Try to create a positive environment.
Instead of just making rules, talk with your child about online safety. Make sure they feel involved in decisions and know that you’re there to chat if they’re worried.
Make sure they know how to block and report someone. Let them know what behaviours are unacceptable or illegal.
Find ways to help build their resilience and self-esteem. This will put them in a good position to handle difficult situations.
Even if your child doesn’t choose to come to you about what they see online, you can encourage them to talk to someone. Let them know you are there if they want to talk but they can also talk to other trusted adults like a teacher, sports coach or family friend. They could also talk to their friends about how they deal with what they see online.
Agree with your child which sites and games they can access and allow them to use them. Tell them you’re happy they use these sites if they know what to do if there is a problem.
Talk to them about healthy relationships and consent, and how to say “no”. This is as important online as it is offline. Read our advice for talking to teenagers about consent and talking to younger children about consent.
Encourage them to think about what they share online. Ask them to imagine that everything they put onto social media and chats shows up on a billboard. This includes pictures, comments and personal information. How would they feel? Would they change what they post?
Put some restrictions in place to protect them. For example, you can set up:
Find out how to do this with Virgin Media O2 and Internet Matters’ guide to parental controls.
Having regular conversations about online safety and putting controls in place will help to keep your child safe. But children can still face risks.
Look out for changes in your child’s mood or behaviour. If they appear withdrawn or they’re sleeping or eating more or less than usual, this can mean there’s something going on that they’re not telling you.
If your child is neurodivergent or has additional learning needs, they might find it harder to spot risks or to tell you what’s going on. SeeAbility have an easy read guide to staying safe online.
You can get more information and support from:
This advice was written by our experienced Parent Talk coaches. Parent Talk is a free online service for parents and carers, provided by the charity Action for Children. For more advice, message our parenting coaches with our online chat.
