Support for your autistic child, with or without a diagnosis

If your child is autistic, or you think they might be, there are ways you and others can support them. Every autistic child has their own characteristics and things they need support with.

You can support your child’s needs, whether they have a diagnosis or not. You can also get them extra help, but some support is easier to access with a diagnosis.

Read our advice on getting an autism assessment for your child.

Many autistic children show differences in the way they communicate and interact with others. Your child might find it difficult to understand what others say or mean through body language and facial expressions. They might also struggle to be understood.

When communicating with your autistic child, you can help them by:

• making sure their surroundings aren’t distracting or overstimulating when you’re trying to communicate
• using their name at the start, so they know you’re talking to them
• speaking clearly using simple words that are easy to understand
• saying what you mean and avoiding phrases that could be confusing, like “it’s raining cats and dogs”
• giving your child time to process what you’ve said before you speak again
• repeating the same sentence again using the same words, if they don’t appear to have processed what you said
• using pictures or writing when you communicate with them

The National Autistic Society has more advice on supporting autistic people with communication.

Some autistic children show strong preferences for doing things in a certain way and changes to this can make them feel anxious.

You can help your child by:

• keeping to a routine they know as much as possible
• showing them a visual timetable of what they’re doing each day
• building time into the routine for your child to relax and prepare for what’s coming next
• preparing them for any changes in routine, you could try writing a social story
• making sure they know what they can do if they’re uncomfortable, such as knowing a quiet spot they can go to

Read more about supporting your autistic child if they feel anxious.

Your child may seek out certain sensory experiences and avoid others depending on what sensory sensitivities they have. This could be touch, smell, sound, visuals or movements. They might avoid some sensory experiences and seek out others. Look out for your child’s responses to different senses, so that you can support their sensory needs.

It can be hard for autistic children to understand their emotions and what others are feeling. You can help them by teaching them some tools when they are feeling calm that they can use when they’re overwhelmed. You can:

• talk to them about what emotions might look like and feel like
• teach them to name their emotions and what they need, for example “I’m feeling really angry, I’m going to take 10 minutes to sit by myself”
• use visuals like feelings as traffic lights or a feelings thermometer
• write social stories about how they might feel in different situations
• teach them things they can do when they feel angry or stressed, such as calming activities

Meltdowns

Sometimes when autistic children feel overwhelmed, this can cause a strong reaction called a meltdown. Learning about what causes your child’s meltdowns and how to calm them can help you to support your child.

Learn more about autistic meltdowns and supporting your child.

Tell your child’s school or childcare setting about anything your child needs support with. You can speak to their teacher, keyworker or SENCo (Special Educational Needs Co-ordinator).

They will make a plan to support your child’s needs, sometimes called an IEP (individual education plan). If your child needs more support than the school can give, the school can apply to the local authority for an EHCP (education, health and care plan).

Find out about getting an EHCP or IEP to support your child’s needs.

There are local and national groups and organisations that can support you and your family. These include:

• parent support groups
• social groups for your child
• parenting courses
• counselling and therapies

You can search for support in your area in the National Autistic Society autism services directory.

Your local council website will have a list of support services in your area. This is sometimes called the local offer. They will also have a special educational needs and disabilities information, advice and support service (SENDIAS).

You might also be eligible for financial support for your child.

If you have other children, they might need some support too.

Sibs: charity for brothers and sisters of disabled children and adults

Information, advice and events for siblings of disabled people.

Sibs website

Page last reviewed: June 2025
Next review due: June 2028